I grew up hearing the phrase “The road to hell is paved with good intentions” from my mother and my uncles. Today rather proved that.
I’d been whining - yes the dreaded wifey style whining - that I really wanted to take the boat out fishing.. I was sick to death of bank fishing.. I was sick to death of dear husband scurrying off each morning with the truck I needed for the boat..
The evenings have been no better - he’s been remodeling the front porch like a mad man, and trust me in this heat he sort of becomes a mad man out there facing west on the roof every evening.
Bless his heart - in an effort to put an end to all my wifey whining, and most likely in an effort to save his sanity - he arrived home early yesterday and proclaimed that he was taking me out in the boat.. I could set tree lines, turtle lines, I could zoom all over the lake..He’s trying here folks..really trying.
He loaded every thing up we could possibly need. In fact I think we could have survived a week long excursion he packed so much stuff in there for me!
We arrived at the ramp..I was giddy with excitement - or perhaps the 107 heat index, I’m not really sure.
When I came back from parking the truck, he just gave me THAT look and said - ” go get the truck.. the battery is dead on this thing” Perhaps I had grievous look in my eyes.. perhaps he really truly wanted me to have good evening fishing, perhaps he was beginning to suffer from heat stroke but he was entirely too cheerful about it as he hauled a myriad of things out so we could set tight lines and bank fish.
Did you hear me..BANK FISH…I am sick of bank fishing, but bank fishing is better than no fishing.
Again good intentions slipping down that slope to hell. and the thermometer on the dash of the truck was proof. it read 101.
My lines snarled, all I could catch was teeny bluegill - which he happily grabbed up for cut bait.. my tight lines ..stayed tight other than the occasional little slider that nipped at them. Darkness fell, my intolerance of all this fishing frustration rose.. TAKE ME HOME
Home I went admonished to go to bed, because were leaving in wee pre dawn hours. Still overly cheerful and probably suffering from heat induced madness, headed back to happily BANK FISH while I rested up for the outing this morning.
Because he stayed out a bit late watching lines that essentially did not move all night we were rushing.. he was crabbing, I had way too much stuff in the boat (Wait a minute who packed the darn thing?) Items deemed unnecessary were flung without regard into the drive way as he admonished me to hurry up..hurry up .. it’s going to get hot ..hurry up..
I hurried. He hurried. As we bumped our way out of the big dip in our driveway where it reaches the state highway (thank you IDOT for the speedy repair of the collapsed culvert) I hear the distinct sound of something crashing.
ME: Something just fell out of the truck or the boat.
HIM: That was just my sunglasses falling behind the seat
ME: Your sunglasses are on the console. It was a big crash….
HIM: you worry too much
We whizzed into the boat ramp just as the sun was peeking over the horizon. Before I reached the back of the truck to help with the boat there was a long and ugly string of expletives that finished with ” YOU forgot to put the battery back in!!!”
Excuse me? I didn’t touch that battery.. the suspicious sounding crash echoed in my mind..
“Do you think….” Before I could finish that sentence he unloaded the boat and headed back to the house to get the battery that clearly I had forgotten.
It was sitting right where I expected it to be - right there in northbound lane of the highway at our driveway.
Upside down, shattered and bleeding,and eating away at what little asphalt is still there.
Too early for anywhere to be open to get a new battery.
So we loaded up the boat yet once again, and he said - “We’ll just BANK FISH until something opens.”
BANK FISH.. BANK FISH!!!
That would have been great except in his frenzy to remove all those unnecessary items some how I had ended up with one small tackle bag and one rod and reel. I didn’t have much to work with.
But because he was trying so hard and his intentions were good.. I smiled, sweated and bank fished until the auto parts store opened.
I fairly skipped out the door hugging the new battery like a newborn child. I tenderly placed in it’s appointed spot in the boat. Gleefully I exclaimed “Which pit are we going to first?”
To which he replied ” Honey the suns up too high, it will be too hot out there for you. Lets just find a shady spot and BANK FISH for a awhile and we’ll take the boat out this evening when it cools off. “
Perhaps he could sense my unhappiness with the whole situation so I was bribed with a large chocolate ice cream cone and the promise of an evening excursion.
Pointing to the thermometer on the truck dash that read 98 he said “See - it’s hot as the hubs of hell already”
It seems the road to today’s particular hell was indeed paved with good intentions.
Let’s hope he leaves the paver at home for the evening excursion!